fin.

I think i'm completely over the blog-phase and I can confidently say that this third blog of mine, is my last.

Right now, i'm more than satisfied with everything. Except maybe the fact that you guys deserved better.

But i somehow know, we're all going to be okay. (:


so with all my love,
Shubha.

surprise! i updated. pun very much intended.

i know ive been a complete bitch by refusing to update. now that facebook's in, i come visit my own blog barely once a week.

anyway, i had the BEST birthday of my life. no really. it was absolutely fantastic. i dont think ive been so surprised in my entire life. i dont know how to thank all of you who turned up enough because it really meant the world to me. so it all started with my grandad making an announcement that "we're all going to a very posh restaurant tomorrow so everyone must be well-dressed". i honestly should have know better especially after,

1) my family spending time taking out their clothes from one pm on that day and doing manicures and facials. they usually just iron something pretty and slip it on.
2) mum and sumyutha having private phone conversations without me as if THEY were good friends
3) dash and my sister becoming best friends
4) mom and dad talking in the kitchen about a cake until i walked in and she gave dad a 'zip' signal
5) my uncle and grandad argueing where we should go for dinner when my uncle had already dropped my parents, aunt and sis to the designated place [they went in the first batch, i was in the second]
6) the chinablacks nervous stares everytime i said "ill see you on monday" when they knew they were going to see me on sunday.

after typing this list out, i officially admit, i am clueless and blur. ah well. good for you surprise planners aye?

so while i expected to go to some posh restaurant to have a quiet dinner with my family, i ended up being made a victim of a SPLENDID surprise party. of course, i was a very happy victim. (: a surprised one too.

a very surprised me, greeted by my closest friends and family. with the camera man. i swear. i felt like an indian bride walking down the aisle. i kept thinking of bend it like beckham where she said "look down. indian brides arnt supposed to smile. you'll ruin the bloody video".

the crowd during sam's wonderful speech.

i was reeeeely happy. (: i felt like a kid in her favourite candy store.

the NJ table.

sam, i really dont know what my mum would have done without you coordinating all my friends, especially during and after the As. and of course all that help from Kat. thank you so much. you know i love you. and its not the usual 'i love you' that i say to everyone. i really mean it. (:
the speech, hats off to you babe. i really dont know how you came up with that many things to say. i know you were lying through your teeth, but still, it meant alot. <3<3<3

i love my friends. dont you think ive got gorgeous friends? i swear.

the AC table with a few njcians. (:

so yeah, as you can see. i couldnt have asked for more. its a pity YOU angmoh assholes were overseas or you'd have been there as well. but you should know that i missed you loads and cant wait for your return which will be eons later.

a special thank you to my family for being the bestest family around. i dont know what id do without you. i LOVE being mahawar. hahaha.

i was stunned. i loved every second of that night. my grandad said to me "it was one of the happiest days of my life".

it was mine too. thank you so much. you have no idea how blessed i feel. (: <3

at subway. yeah, we ate at subway all glammed up.

i still like this picture of you phoebs. haha.

PRETTY SAM. thank goodness you got ready at the hotel room. i think you'd agree. (:

zhang you so sexy. hahahhahahah.

cuba libre. we've always wanted to go there. funny how we went on a day where the band dint play and neither did they serve any food. ha.

ive been going out non-stop. and oh, i finally finished reading harry potter 6. yeah, 6. im going to embark on 7. for those of you who dont know, number 5 [the order of the phoenix] completely put me off reading. as a result, i dint read a single book throughout JC save for the first chapter of 'can asian's think' by kishore mahbubani. guess what? number 6 [the half blood prince] has got me hooked again. hahha. ive got a whole list of books im yearning to read now. from chick books such as 'a girl for all seasons' by camilla morton to inspiring shit like 'leaving microsoft to change the world' by john wood. and of course trump's new book. (: i almost forgot how much i used to love reading.

just as a closing thought. a paragraph from harry potter 6 [i know, quoting from HP is pretty sad] really struck a chord.

"There is a difference between being dragged into the arena to face a battle to death and walking into the arena with your head held high. Some people, would say that there is little to choose between the two ways but i think, there is all the difference in the world"

i believe it applies to all of us, if we really think about it. sure, we're not quite facing death [at least we hope] but our difficulties and troubles are burden enough to bear. i suppose we could only keep our chin-up, and do what we believe to be right, with a smile no matter what the outcome.

okay, emo-talk over. its post As. im supposed to be happy. no wait. i am happy. i dont remember being more elated in a long long time.
(: (: (: (: (:

Met the chinablacks after the SATS paper. yes, im done for good with the SATS. i just hope i do decently enough. Anyway, the 3 of them made their way specially down on a saturday just to celebrate kat's and my birthday. thanks guys. (: you know i loved it.

been doing alot of things ever since the As ended. for starters, i havnt touched a pen yet. im not kidding. i wouldnt have had to lift a pencil save for SATS. but that's over as well. haha. Ive been reading the newspapers. i suppose that would have been more helpful before GP but ah well. i know what movies are going on unlike before when i dint have a clue. speaking of which, caught game plan and dhan dhana dhan goal. the former was a family movie and omg the rock has a 10 million dollar smile. the latter was even more satisfying. especially with john abrahams short hair. i think he'd be india's version of christiano ronaldo if he were to join the india football team [hahahahhahaha. dont even get me started on their standard]. ive been catching up with friends from all over. and even my sister. and now its going to be even better with prom coming up as well as LOTS of partying given my legal status.

the main purpose of this post was to thank EVERYONE who wished me. i felt so loved on friday and saturday. seriously. ALL the sms's, calls, friendster comments, fb wallposts, fb messages, long-distance calls, flowers in the mail, presents, meet-ups, cakes, lunches and pictures. thank you for EVERYTHING.

i like being 18. ive been telling everyone how when i buy a drink from now or enter a club, im going to SHOVE my ID into the bouncer's/bartender's face. :D

my favourite filipino.

Katlyn Krista Batuigas Lagumbye.
Crazy. Whacky. Stoned. Emotionfull. Emotionless. Practical. Gorgeous. Actcute. THE LOVE.

We've been practically attached to each other for 1 year and 9 months. same class, same clique, same CCA, same everything. yeah. im pretty sick of you i guess. did i mention how glad i was that we're done with JC?



I mean, i used to have to put up with this.

ohhhh. and waking you up during every lecture and tutorial was pure torture.

and dont even get me started on pictures. you put up UNGLAM pictures of me. its my turn bitch. here's ONE.

and ANOTHER.

damn, i cant find any others. because you're too bloody goddamn pretty. i loved being inseparable during the 2 years. its funny how we'd always count on each other during lessons or whatever to 'take note of the details' but we'd both end up being stoned and clueless about EVERYTHING.

all we did was plug in our ipods, listen to emo songs and eat rojak. we did ALOT of things actually. you were my do-random-crazy-things-that-noone else-would-do-partner. ill never forget climbing into and out of school via the gate just for kicks. how we stayed back to do the banner. throwing ourselves on the windows of buses in an attempt to scare people on the street. endless whining about grades and getting to the US of A. playing more than words on the guitar. being your band's mikestand. our raindance/harharmahadev variations. coming up with names for particular guys in school. all our ridiculous strategies and plans *thinks of banner for mr-hot-smouldering-eyes. these are only several out of the infinite number of things we've done together.

you know, even though we never executed half our plans, it was making them that was so fun. you gave me a million and one reasons to laugh during all our 'planning sessions'. our ideas are absolutely insane but i love each one because im sure no one else could think of such whacky things to entertain themselves with.


this is such a typical expression of yours. the whole "what the fuck's going on" expression. Your total heck-care attitude to things you dont appreciate or to people you dont agree with really sets you apart. ive always loved the way you're so honest. you tell me straight to my face if you think im doing something off tangent and you never lie about how you feel. "i feel angry and pissed at everything and everyone around me". hahahahha. its these things that make you an even closer friend of mine.

afterall, we've vowed to become farmers if nothing works out for us aye? ive got your back hun. when we're ploughing in those fields under the scorching sun in the fields be it in philippines or in india, we're going to be inseparable then as well.


afterall, how could i ever lose touch with a girl who's such a good banger.

i think ive told you this. you're one of the prettiest filipinos ive ever seen with an even more beautiful personality.

so here's to you. and all of us, for all the excellent times we've had together. they've been priceless.


equally priceless is this ONE photo we've managed to capture, across our 2 years of attachment. how strange isnt it? but i remember this moment, in the coffeeclub. we were really happy, with not much to worry about. we've always been happy, even in school despite the occasional rants and tears. because this is practically our only picture together, i believe its special and its enough. hell, of course we're going to take tonnes of pictures together next week and once you get back next year. but this one makes me smile and i know it always will.

just this blog post will never be sufficient to voice everything. you know i love you too much.

happy birthday kat.

all the love.

its a strange world we live in.
its a strange nation, india.

i was watching this documentary on discovery channel [surprise surprise] and i must say, it was really well done. great facts, images, realities showing us alot about the country.

its amazing how the spectrum is so wide ranging from the poorest of the poor to the wealthiest people.

while there's a lavishly decorated [by cheap labour] wedding going on in one of the five star hotels on one street, several streets parallel to that one, there's an equally significant, but a basic wedding, with far less diamonds and glam going on in a small temple between these cheap labourers and their to-be wifes, whom they probably have never seen/met before.

while there're corrupted priests and pundits indulging in drug, sex and alcohol, there're little aspiring boys, pure and holy, in rishikesh who're on their way in the belief that the world will indeed be a peaceful and sacred place, one day.

while there're five year old boys playing on their playstation in their mansions, again, several streets away there're five year old boys stringing flowers to sell in exchange for income during the month of diwali.

while there's a wealthy bride shopping for her 5 lack rupee 'lehenga', there's another woman, buying simple red cloth either readymade or to sew into a lehenga. and as she sew's this traditional gown, she's weaving together the dreams she sees for herself and her spouse.

while there're sons who dont do so well and get to be CEO's because their dad owns the company, there're those who buy books and study under the streetlamps in the hope that meritocracy will do them justice.

while one pollutes the holy ganges/ganga, another, prays to it and bathes in to to clense and purify himself.

there're so many inconsistancies which are unfair and unjust. its not about the numbers of people who're suffering from poverty. the numbers, are a mere indicator to rank countries and nations on the world scale. what matters more, is what the individual is going through. its so easy to say "he" is hungry. try saying "i", and it hurts.

but whatever it is, meera nair's narration summed it up,
"india's a land of hope".
i only pray this hope, is awarded one day. that day's not far i believe with the industrial progress india's seeing. yeah, its not going to happen tomorrow or anytime soon, but it'll come, eventually.

donald trump's new book's got the right spirit. "think big and kick ass". idealising and being hopeful's going to pay off, of course with action and committment.

its about time.

hot guy and hot girl

A hot guy and a hot girl go to a restaurant.
The hot girl falls down, what does the hot guy say?

-->"shubha, are you okay?" hahhahahahhah.

okay, cheapthrill over. went for a party yesterday and shweta told me this which i found absolutely hilarious. of course i modified it a tad bit. ;)

Hahaha. the things my friends do.

phoebs, the new jap pop princess in town.

us and our angles.

timbre. the band EIC is something. i saw the first indian lead singer of a band who has a good voice. i was reeely impressed. (: they opened the evening with bittersweet symphony which did it for me. (:

zhang! at modestos. can anyone look after her bunny rabbit called bun bun for her? she's going overseas and needs someone to look after it for a week.

chinablacks outing was really fun. (: it was great to just relax for a while and not have to worry about school. it was the FIRST ever one in two entire years that all six of us were there. imagine that. haha. but we're still good friends, im sure all six of us couldnt deny that.

and tseruey joined us as well! id put that picture up but you wouldnt want that, trust me.
all we did was go to this restaurant to eat, and then to that, to eat again. :S and ohh, we watched saawariya. i thought it was great. the rest hated it. talk about horrible taste. its such an innocent movie emphasizing on the raw emotions that people feel. too bad people *ahem dont appreciate such movies. haha.

finally met up with the acians after an eternity.

pretty amanda!


us and our angles, again.

that would be the mg girls. dash insisted she'd ruin the picture. silly girl.

steph looks gorgeous even in her uniform.

DASH. i never got a picture with her. but here she is anyway.
we went to subway because of the indians cravings. sat at the benches at Lido for the longest time and introduced them to bollywood music, which they liked fyi.
it felt good. (:

its so good exams are over. im finally catching up with friends i havnt seen in ages. now it feels as if all that hard work and studying was all worth it.

i totally dig this feeling.

IM ADDICTED TO TIMBRE.

post A levels have been fun. (: and there's still moreee to come.

NJC 2006-2007

so i know this post is wayyyy overdue.

i bet you guys are tired reading stuff like "its been such a long journey" and "omg its overrr" and "its party time" etcetera.

you're going to have to go through it once more. haha.

remember that state of euphoria i talked about a couple of entries ago? its here. funny thing is, i felt it stronger than ever BEFORE my last paper than after [considering how the mcq went] but what the hell, its back again, and im so excited, for everything.
there're lunch lists, party promises, serene sunrises, movie marathons, dance dhammakas, food frenzies, slumber surprises, birthday bashes, baseball battings, pretty pictures and so many more things that're beckoning. yes, i made it a point to 'alliterate' everything.

i really feel like doing this, those who've gone through all these things will probably see this entry through till the end.

ill always remember, [us/we is relative here, you guys know who you are. (:]
- the beginnings of the bimbo clique
- the toothache problem and B1 and B2 during our first house session
- mekgunko and snurtle/monkeyboy and what was the other called again? tarzan?
- the mother fathers
- popping peanuts into our mouths and zhang beating me every damn time
- the vending machine
- cheating, or rather attempting to cheat the vending machine
- the orientation parties which we never missed
- calling ourselves golden brown
- bouncing to mr stereophones at orchard, you convincing me to skip everything that day
- skanky phone conversations
- going to hindi school with you
- jumping outside the toilet to scare the both of you but it came across as "woman in black randomly jumping across toilet" and us ending up in fits on the toilet floor
- dance
- staring up at the starless/starful sky after dance all sweaty and disgusting
- wanting to dress up in aluminium foil to scare people, pretending to be martians
- singing practices away
- the guitar, more than words
- supporting the mother fathers everytime they played [prom, how?]
- taking pictures with the old man at your house
- unglam pictures
- glam pictures
- the seniors
- the come clean session we regret happened till today
- emo brekkos sessions
- funtasia when the both of us stayed back to paint banners, and that hugeass cardboard sign that said "pasta" and that convincing 3D arrow you drew
- eating all the condensed milk and drinking the bitter cold tea after that
- yong tau foo
- being the worst CT rep EVER. HAHA.
- finding excuses to skip YLTC
- bruised knees
- melissa, omg, do you guys still remember who we used to call melissa?
- your council dilemmas and rantings which you eventually overcame. haha
- dholna
- wade robson, bang bang bang
- shoot bang marry
- the beach hut, "charlies angels"
- the birthday surprise for us, you burnt your hair, you lent us your house, you both played and sang "all about you", you jumped around and made us feel elated, you all made our day
- harold and kumar, please come again, thank you!

okay, so this was the bulk of last year. there's so much more its impossible i would have written everything but this is what i remember as of now. hahahha. im sorry but im so into this im going to completely continue and bring you into 2007.

- we got promoted to being mr dio's "charlies angels" hahahha.
- round tables, still, as orange as ever
- lignum beaver badges
- five people ran, five people got the positions, and the two of us werent part of it!
- mass run
- the efficiency gang
- SYF, i got up and sat down in the dance 21 times
- horrible knees, no skirts
- me falling flat on my face in the gym
- the pakistani's
- going to the airport not caring about any lessons we had
- you said "i think ****** has hot smouldering eyes", us, hysterical
- that day at madjacks, we thought it'd be an awesome year ahead
- march, april, may, worst three months of my life, besides for SYF
- learning a huge lesson ill never forget
- you guys, for never telling anyone what had happened for that one week
thank you, ill always know you all have my back. (:
- those messages
- common tests
- har har mahadev
- gold with honours with special mention
- the rooftop birthday celebration
- the roses from random people
- my round and round the building theory
- the three of us being notorious
- we got ME on our cert. !!!
- "happy birthday ******, come on over baby, you know you want to" im so sorry i cant remember what it was exactly, kill me for forgetting such an important detail
- results getting the better of us
- endless reflecting and whining. what would we have done without the round tables?
- buying the NJ jacket so that i go for prelims with the right attitude and ending up not wearing it at all
- pt's hug that changed everything
- hard kaur and ash king
- bombay
- mama caribbean, dancing barefoot in the pub
- chem consultations
- estivo outings
- mr neo almost giving up on us during math
- mr neo saying "you've improved" and me almost bursting out into tears. haha.
- the stats test, my first ever B for jc math
- 26, 25...18....10....5...0 days to Alevels
- the final countdown, us running in grey on that green hill with wind in our hair
- having no papers in the hall
- the good lucks, hugs, messages, all reinforcing the fact that the big As were actually here
- before the econs paper
- after the econs paper
- after chem P1
- uhhh, "is this vegetarian? No? okay, ill have it." and "wont it fall down cause of gravity?". "this is not what i ordered"
- "how long did you do shisha for?"
- "zig a zig ah"
- 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. JC's over.

that's all there is, there isn't anymore.
but the memories, each of them, still vivid and captured, all with me. (:

i couldnt have asked for a better 2 years, with everything we went through. the good, and the bad. the predicted, and the unexpected. the laughter, and the tears.
the love.

50 years down the road, no matter where i am, im going to look back and smile. its been a helluva journey. and im glad it was alongside you guys, in NJC.

here's to us. the batch of 2007. mainstream and IP. its been fun.

"the national dream, fulfilled for all to see"